Autumn Lamb Stew

I had a version of this back when I first moved back to the Pacific Northwest (my home!) from where I had been living in the San Francisco Bay Area. The Bay Area is lovely, but it just ain’t me, you know? Sometime during my first week back, I found myself...

Roasted Butternut Squash Soup

IT’S DECORATIVE GOURD TIME, MOTHERFUCKERS! It’s also time for soup. Warm, tasty, nourishing soup. It’s Autumn (Fall, for you folks who hate syllables), and this year, Autumn feels like it skipped right to Winter, it’s a trip. And it’s...

Truffled Mushroom Fettuccine

Sometimes I whip something tasty up in the kitchen, and it’s a simple matter of “oh, I have these things, this makes sense, I’m gonna make a thing.” Especially if I have a craving for a certain “flavor profile” but not a concrete...

GOT CRABS?

I am a huge fan of seafood, ESPECIALLY Dungeness crab. And I am fortunate enough to live in a part of the country where I can literally go to the end of a pier, drop a crab pot, and, when I pull it up?  CRAB FRIENDS. The kind of crabs you’re HAPPY to catch! I am...

Pig meat, cream, and booze…OH MY!

It’s been a busy cooking weekend.  FINALLY a weekend where I can just “relax” (ha!!!) and be a maniac in the kitchen all weekend. For breakfast, I made that delightful smoked salmon and cheesy dill omelet with the horseradish cream sauce and...

More like Philly SEX Steak, AMIRIGHT?

Do you wake up sometimes and think, G’DAMN, I WANT A GIANT PHILLY CHEESE STEAK SAMMICH IN MY MOUTH!? Just me?  Yeah, I didn’t think so. Well, I had happened upon a recipe for a Keto Philly Cheese Steak Wrap and it didn’t move me, so I decided to do...
Carl’s Steak and Cheesy Effing Spinach

Carl’s Steak and Cheesy Effing Spinach

I am fortunate because I know some folks who can freakin cook. Take my friend, Carl, for example. He’s been a Keto Slut for quite a while and he’s been teasing me with sexy pictures of his food for as long as I can remember. SPECIFICALLY this one damn...
SEXY CHEESY CAULI-HASHBROWNS

SEXY CHEESY CAULI-HASHBROWNS

Hey, guys! Honestly, there are some days (weeks) where all I want is a low carb smoothie because I’m all cheesed and egged out (THE HELL YOU SAY? I know, it freaks me out, too), and most days, I’m probably just going to do a scramble with eggs and cheese...

Sad Is The Man

Sad is the man.   …the man who realizes that he failed to work white male privilege into anything more genital-stimulating than a successful online gaming career.   …that he may have missed the whole point of having a wiener.   What is the point of wiener...