The Question

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I’ve been asked more than a few times: Why “Vagina Devil Magic?”

Having a Facebook presence under the name “Vagina Devil Magic” can bring about some interesting (that’s one word for it) questions.

Of course, and this will be a surprise to literally no one who has been on the internet for more than a minute, dozens of lost souls show up to my social media accounts hoping to literally see pictures of magic vaginas or devils sporting vaginas or fuck, I don’t even know what some of these dudes are expecting other than some glimmer of hope that someone somewhere will offer up their vagina as a penis cozy. Optimism is cool I suppose.

Then, when they see that is not the case, I am often regaled with that old song and dance that, and I quote (literally hundreds of yam-sacks have said these exact words to me), “No one wants to read your feminazi shit.”

Well, here’s the thing. People DO, as it turns out, want to read my and many others’ feminazi shit.

Maybe not Kevin from Ridgefield, Washington, who, after a long, hard day of pissing himself in the basement of his mother’s house that sits not far from a field where confederate flags proudly fly to honor a bunch of traitors and losers of a war over slavery, only wants to see his idea of the perfect pussy attached to a woman who has lost all sense of smell, taste, and self-worth so much to where they may pay attention to this failure-to-launch keyboard warrior.

But a lot of other people do.

The term “Vagina Devil Magic” is a term that represents the blame that’s put on women (all women no matter their age, color, or assignment at birth) for the behavior of weak, entitled men.

The boys at school are distracted by the shoulder flesh of their female counterparts. Or a collarbone. Or a naked knee-pit.

Male collarbone? Just skin over bone.

Female collarbone? OH MY GOD, SOMEONE’S GONNA SEE THAT AND WANT TO FUCK IT. PROTECT OUR CHILDREN FROM THE WHOOOOOOOORE!

Men can’t be expected to work alongside attractive women. For godssakes, this is a work place, if there’s tits around, how can they get a single thing done?

Men can’t be expected NOT to rape their fellow soldiers in the military. In 2013, the national embarrassment that was the 45th president of the United States tweeted this gem:

“What did these geniuses expect when they put men & women together?”

Of course. What did they expect? Men can’t be expected to be civilized human beings around women in proximity to their dicks, right? How can they control themselves with all that Vagina Devil Magic in their presence.

I’ll tell you what I expect: For us not to be raped. For us to be treated like fellow human beings, deserving of respect and bodily autonomy.

So…Vagina Devil Magic is a loaded term in my opinion. It speaks to the misplacement of blame. Woman exists, woman tempts, woman steers men into bad behavior because he was pussy-mezzed and just couldn’t help himself.

Who’s the “weaker sex” again?

Vagina Devil Magic is also, for me, is a term that I decided was a fantastic counter to the term “Big Dick Energy,” a term that’s used to imply a confidence that one might have if they’re swinging a big ol’ dick in their panties. Big dick energy implies a swagger. It implies, oh that dude has it made, right? Because he’s got big dick energy.

NEVER MIND that one can harbor a schlong the size of my forearm and still remain mostly useless and/or actively terrible, so maybe that energy isn’t inspired by anything worthy, but I digress…

Vagina Devil Magic, in my opinion and as used here, is just…energy. Like I say in my pinned posts on social media, you don’t have to have born with a birth canal or any other physical feature to exude Vagina Devil Magic any more than you have to be a human tripod to exude Big Dick Energy.

I guess it just depends on which, if either, phrase you feel at home with and, in the case of VDM, whether you want to take a phrase that’s been used to place blame and say, yeah, you know what? Fuck yeah. I’m gonna own that shit, fuck you if you don’t like it.

I own that shit.